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This Farming Business


We will not let your wildlife interfere

In our flat-capped industrial business.

We will protect our ground as a fortress

Not leaving no space for your wolf or bear.


Let your disease become an injury,

Inflicted on us so deliberately,

Attacking that which we hold most dearly.

Don't think you'll stop till we’re in poverty.


Don’t mistake then a farm for countryside

Nothing of the sort mate, just a common

myth. We’re here to make a nice profit on

our land, which means we must use biocide.


There’s no wilderness left for you to see.

You think we want critters spreading disease?

Attacking our stock and beaverin' our trees -

that's if decide to leave you any.


Hedges grow ugly and get in the way.

Haven’t you noticed? Why d’you think we

get rid of the buggers when we can’t see

any bloody point in letting ‘em stay?


Shelter and cover do not concern me

Animals are tough. Oh, they’ll be all right.

Anyway, can’t see ‘em, can I, at night

from my agricultural tenancy.


It’s nice and big for my vast family

And don’t need planning permission for it!

Tough on you mate, you don’t like it one bit.

But don’t moan at me for no sympathy.


Stewards of the country is what we say.

And do our bit, don’t you worry 'bout that.

That useless bit o'land is total crap

‘Tis always a good scam for what you pay.


Ha! The homeward ploughman don’t plod these days.

I sits in me nice warm powerful tractor.

And don’t care if earth gets compacted or

turned to mud. Yours is just another craze.


We’ll plough on for sure cos that’s what this is.

You should know by now it's an Industry

The soil is the floor of our factory.

If you still don’t get it: this is Business.

© R M Meyer

North Devon, March 2019